All done

My period of acting up is all over. You might remember if you're a long term sufferer of my ramblings that I wrote here about my boss leaving and stepping in to her shoes for a while.

Well, that while is up now. The time has passed very quickly and, whisper it, I've enjoyed it! I was very worried about what to expect and had a bit of a wobbly start but all in all it's gone well. I've survived, not gained any extra grey hairs and my normal sleep pattern may have actually improved – not greatly but a little.

So now the questions. Will I regret not applying? I don't think so. If I'm honest the time wasn't right back in November – if it were now after gaining the experience then possible I would have applied. No regrets though, the new boss starts on Monday and I know her well as she is internal to the organisation. Just in case she reads this I better say some nice things....ummm, where shall I start? Tell you what, I'll give her a week and let you know!!

I will confess though, to feeling a little flat yesterday as I returned to my usual desk, having the space of my own office for a few weeks has been very nice – a little lonely at times but my usual office is only next door so I didn't have to go far for company.

Anyway, onwards and upwards. If a job comes up in the future I think I'll apply for it – trouble is I really love the subject matter that I work in currently. That's Women & Children's health. I have a great relationship with the rest of the team – we are an achieving team, all of us working to the same goals which really helps. I'm also reluctant to move to a different hospital. Where I work now is a short walk to work and as I'm getting older I can't face the thought of a drive to work – it would be at least 45 minutes each way to the nearest hospitals.

I should also mention that none of this would be possible without the support that I received form my colleagues - thanks guys, you've been great!

Here's to the next challenge!

Acting up

I've started the build up to my 'acting up' period at work – no, silly, I don't mean a period of having mad tantrums and generally misbehaving (although it may well come to that!)

As I'm writing this I am not sure whether or not I will hit the publish button, but I'm going to continue anyway.

As I've mentioned before, my boss is leaving and that momentous day is now only 10 working days away and for five of those days she is on annual leave. So it's up to me to now start assuming the mantle, we're making joint decisions and sharing the responsibilities for day to day stuff. She has a wealth of experience within our service having worked professionally in health all of her working life, which, compared to my mere eight years, is quite a feat. She always seems to know the right answer, to make the right decision, to use the right words – she has a real presence. I on the other hand feel technically competent – by that I mean I can manage the targets, manage the budgets, think on my feet to get things done now, I think can motivate the team, I can empower others – but I still have this little niggle of doubt that I am competent enough to deliver the whole package.

This is by far the highest level that I have ever worked at in my whole life. I have a milestone birthday coming up (which doesn't take a genius to calculate given the ages of my offspring) and that alone scares me. I could hopefully retire in 10 years time if my occupational pension will pay sufficient and I am starting to doubt my sanity in even agreeing to act up.

Regardless of all of the above I have agreed to do the job so I need to make a go of it. The interviews for a replacement were held yesterday and from what I've heard, boy, I'm so glad I didn't apply. There were some really tough questions and presentation requirements as befits the level of job.

I don't know how often I'll blog for the next few months (although it may only be a matter of weeks if they appointed yesterday, information that I am not privy to) but I might, at times, need to pour my soul into cyberspace just to get things off of my chest – remember my theory, I only write this for myself and the friend that I call Julie, so if you're reading this and you're not Julie please bear with me!

So, as I sit on Saturday morning, 21 November 2009, all snug in my pink pyjamas (albeit with icy cold feet – still no slippers) I'm ready for it. I have a feeling of anticipation, expectation and dread. I have an incredibly full diary for the next two months thanks to the lovely V (it's that time of year when all of the fixed meeting dates are issued!) who has agreed to take on half of my role for the period – the other half will be covered by the equally lovely I.

Thanks for reading – if you have – I really appreciate everybody's visits.